Heartbreak # 2

So this brings us to middle school. Seventh grade, to be exact. The beginning of the new school year and I knew that I was so much more mature than I was before. I had forgotten all about the second grade and moved on.

I'll be honest. I never really actually had feelings for you before our little mishap. I thought you were just another guy who thought I was cute and wanted to go out with me because you wanted your friends to know you were capable of getting a girlfriend. But those qualities made me feel special. I liked that you talked about me to your friends and how you weren't going to give up until you had me. And as long as we're on honest terms, I'll admit that back then, I didn't know how special I could be to someone. I liked the attention you gave me. A lot.

The first time we met was at the frightdome. You liked me. And I sensed that.

It was Friday the thirteenth, a few weeks after the fightdome. I remember that. It was the day of our seventh grade field trip to the Renaissance fair when you asked me to be your girlfriend. I said "sure." I didn't say "yes," or "absolutely," or "okay," only because I didn't mean any of those things. I said sure because I knew that I was only giving you a chance.

That day, we had fun. We has so much fun at the fair, and I remember you bought me a crown and a snow cone. And we spent forever looking at each other. Admiring each other. Liking each other more and more.

Then came my friend's party. This is where it all went down. Nothing bad, as far as health goes. But that was when I fell for you. The night I fell and fell hard for you. And it wasn't even before you asked me out. I fell for you when we first kissed. And to be honest, I didn't feel a thing. The only thing I felt was cold. Because it was October and you kissed me at the door. I remember that much.

But I knew that a kiss didn't mean anything. It was nothing. Our relationship beside that was more important. It was then I knew that we would work. I even remember counting each day we were dating. Every morning I'd wake up and view my calendar to see what day we were on.

Then, well. I should have saw this coming. But I was too lost in your eyes to find the way out of the problem that would soon come to my attention.

I can't remember why, or you telling me why, but you came to school one day and suddenly lost all feelings for me. And this sucked. Because I was finally falling for you and you just all of a sudden stopped.

I went straight up to my room when I heard this and dialed my friend's phone number. We talked and talked about you. I knew that she understood. Because she listened to me cry for you. I cried because I was finally getting used to you and you wanted to end it. I cried because your friends never liked me. I cried because I fell for you harder than I ever thought I'd fall for anyone. I cried because I realized in the end that the joke was on me.

At school the next morning, I couldn't look at you. I couldn't face embarassment. So I asked my friends to do it for me. I asked them to tell you it was over. And I was watching from behind the people in the cafeteria when they told you it was over. And do you remeber your reaction? Because I do.

You fell to your knees and yelled out, "YES!" and walked away. And I held my tears back because I didn't want to cry in front of anymore people. Not in front of you, anyway.